It's For the Birds!

I appreciate the fact that laws and ordinances are necessary, and I'm normally perfectly willing to comply, but this one is for the birds! In early October I drove down to a McDonalds restaurant, went through the drive-through and ordered a hamburger and a coffee.

Once I received my meal I drove over to a nearby parking space in front of their building and proceeded to eat my meal. It was a beautiful sunny day and although the air was a bit cool it was nice enough for my window to be rolled down.

Several barn swallows flew over and one landed on the fender of my car. The bird gazed intensely through my windshield begging for a hand-out. By now some seagulls and crows joined in for an anticipated feeding frenzy. I decided I only wanted to feed the birds some of the lettuce from my hamburger so I tore off some and tossed it out the window aiming toward the barn swallows who had arrived before the other birds. Now I probably had tossed the birds what amounted to be only perhaps a one inch strip of lettuce, which of course was quickly devoured. I was enjoying the entertainment the birds provided as they ate their healthy snack of lettuce.

As I was feeding the birds a man dressed in a McDonalds uniform walked up to my car window. He began to speak and proceeded to say, "Excuse me, but you are not supposed to feed the birds!" I thought he was joking and so when I looked up to him I was laughing, expecting him to return my laugh with one as well, or at least a smile. My laughter was not received well as he starred at me with a serious stoic look on his face. I quickly realized he was serious! He then begins to ramble on, "I'm sorry Miss, but the city ordinance prohibits feeding the birds." I then replied and said, "Look, all I gave the birds was lettuce, which is biodegradable, and as you can see it's already been devoured!" As he realized I didn't take him seriously he sheepishly walked away as he muttered, "I just thought I would let you know it's prohibited!"

Oh my gosh! Arrest me for heavens sakes! We wouldn't want the poor little birds to get a natural meal of lettuce, now would we? Don't they have more important laws to enforce than to create such ridiculous ordinances! Their ordinance is literally for the birds!

© October 2006 Author: Tammara Nelson
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